You might be surprised at the number of questions I get from strangers about being a mother of twins. Some are incredibly invasive, and my answer goes something like this: “No, we didn’t use fertility treatments. Thanks for asking. How well are YOUR reproductive organs working these days?” Some are incredibly uneducated: “Well…they’re boy-girl. So no, they aren’t identical. No…really…that’s like biologically impossible. There’s at least one MAJOR difference.” But most people are well-meaning, so I try not to grumble.
I think one of the questions I get asked that’s really difficult to answer is: “What’s it like having twins?”
That’s a kind of hard question to answer just in passing. Having twins is joyful. Having twins is hard. Having twins is busy. Having twins is hilarious. Having twins makes you feel like you’re the circus coming to town whenever you go out in public. But it might just be better if I illustrate this for you with a few examples.
What it’s like being pregnant with twins…
If you’ve been pregnant before, you might THINK you know what huge is. But you have NO idea. And hey, Kate Gosselin is saying that exact same thing to me right now, I suppose.
Being VERY brave here. This is me, at 35 weeks pregnant (a week and a half before the twins were born). At 35 weeks with two babies, my belly measured as if I was 42 weeks pregnant with one baby (like I was 2 weeks overdue). Translation: MISERABLE! At least it was winter.
What it’s like giving birth to twins…
Without getting graphic.
Well, again, if you’ve experienced the whole pushing one baby out, just imagine doing it again 8 minutes later. Trippy.
And for those of you who have never given birth, here is a pictorial description:
You may be astounded at my candor here. But let me just say–another part of the joyful experience of giving birth to twins (in a teaching hospital) is that EVERYONE wants in on the action. I think every nurse, doctor, midwife, intern, candy striper, priest, security guard, janitor and gift shop attendant in the hospital was in the room with me that day. That’s like 10% of Chicago’s population. They’ve ALL seen the goods. So really, that lemon up there is nothin’. I have no shame.
What it’s like having two newborns…
First, the cuteness. Oh, the cuteness!
Immediately after my twins were born, they had to go under this heat lamp thing while the neonatal team checked them out. My daughter was not so happy about this, my son grabbed her hand. She calmed down. *waits for your collective “Aws”* Yep, it sounded just like that in the hospital room too.
Next, everyone and their brother assumed I’d lose my mind with two newborns and a 2-year-old at home. But this was not the case. Maybe it was just my twins, but all they did was sleep for about two months. Wake-up. Diaper change. Eat. Sleep. Repeat. That was it. They never really cried. Half the time I forgot they were there (just kidding). Those days are what I like to call The Easy Part.
…getting to be models for all your friends (or friends of friends) who sell things on Etsy.