As the mother to three very young children, I feel it is my duty to protect them from the evils of poisonous Halloween candy. Sure, sure. Trick or treating is all fun and games, until someone bites into something lethal. So to help others who may share in Halloween Candy Protection Duty, I thought I would share the five candy bars most likely to be poisonous.
1.) Kit Kat Bars
Hiding between the layers of chocolate and crisp wafers is poison. That’s right. Poison. Best not to let your kids eat this one.
2.) Reeses Peanut Butter Cups (In Any Shape or Size)
You only think that’s delicious peanut butter inside chocolate cups. You wanna know what it really is? Poison. Evil, evil poison.
It’s chocolate. It’s peanuts. It’s caramel. It’s nougat. NO! It’s POISON! If you see this in your child’s candy bag, confiscate it immediately before they can take a bite.
4.) Almond Joy
I admit there is some discrepancy here, as others have reported that they have never found Almond Joy to be particularly poisonous. If you happen to come upon a safe batch in your child’s candy bag, by all means, let them keep it. But every single Almond Joy bar I have ever found has been quite poisonous.
Watch out for this doozy of a treat–twin candy bars in one package. Double the poison.
If you stay vigilant in the hunt for these dangerous items, your children should stay safe this Halloween. It’s a tough job being a parent, but someone has to do it. What? I’ve got some nougat on my teeth? Oh, dear. How embarrassing.